It is not beauty that endears, it’s love that makes us see beauty. (5)

To Pray

d42902a7a6136d67e8f719f9d6a4a478I see all the hurt that is out there and I can’t take it. It upsets me, regardless if it should or not. I don’t like that a lot of the pain and suffering is from things that are self-induced or brought on senselessly by other people.

I have tried really hard to think that maybe that person is going through something I don’t know about. That is why they are acting the way they are.  I know that it makes me feel better to walk away when I think of it that way.

I am not perfect. Lord knows that. I am trying to be a better version of myself daily. I have three daughters that look up to me. I also do a lot of things with and for others. I want them to be proud that they are associated with me. I want them to think of me as a positive person who always tried to do what was best. Hurting someone for a quick sense of  gratification is not going to get me that.

Let us all take a moment to really think about how we can be a better person to those around us. I have made up my mind to pray more. I mean to really stop and pray more. When I see people hurting, when I see hate, or whenever I am called to do it. I am not going to say “I’ll pray for you,” and then never do it or remember to do it. I am going to take a moment right then and there to really pray for them. It won’t cost me anything but a minute or two of my time. Time well spent if you ask me.

We can all do it. Something to better ourselves, and those around us. What will you be doing?

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It is not beauty that endears, it’s love that makes us see beauty. (5)

Taking It Back

Have you ever had to take it back? I am talking about you life. I seem to lose myself quit often because I feel like I go through this about once every couple years. I am really tired of it too. I think I am going to take back my life and make this time a lasting one. That is my hopes anyways. I don’t think that I have ever really stated that part. When you say it out loud, doesn’t that mean it kind of as to happen?

I like to run – nothing far. I did a half marathon and that is probably about the farthest I really want to go. No real marathon runner in my blood – just the sort of long runs – okay, it is still a really long ways.  I am not interested in really doing it every month either – maybe twice a year. Sounds good, right? I think so.  Anyways, I started on the running topic to tell you that I have not really been running. Not because I don’t want to. Because I really just don’t know how to fit everything in anymore. I mean – how do you?

I used to be able to do it all. I would get up early, clean, cook, get kids ready, myself, work, and so many more things. How did I get so bad at doing it all? I mean it is a struggle to get out of bed. That can be attributed to the severe lack of vitamin D. Then it seems like I am less productive anymore. I don’t get anything but myself ready and kids and out the door. I used to be so accomplished by  5 am. Why does this bug me so much?

It bugs me because I like feeling accomplished. That is the main reason I work. I like to get things done and do them well. I guess with a job you get that satisfaction of a happy customer. A completed project. At home I don’t really get that from anyone, but I feel proud. I want that feeling again. My problem is that There is another addition to the family. There is going to be one less major player in the family in a month or so. Somehow I have to figure out how to keep my sanity in it all. I need to run again. That is where this comes full circle. My story wasn’t completely rambles. Only slightly.

I also have not had the fire to go to church anymore. I am not really sure why either. It isn’t because I have fallen from the Lord. It seems like I just don’t have that fire for my church anymore. I don’t like going to the main service, only the Sunday School. I love that. I just feel like I need more and am missing it. On base there are programs, but they are during the day. I need something at night, or at least with childcare.  I would love it to be close to home too. I thought about finding something on base – but I am not sure that I want that. I do want to go outside of base and meet new people, but I just am not sure where I want to be.  I may try one of the start up churches around here. There is on that meets at the movie theater right outside of the gate. I might just do that this weekend too. I need to do something.

Tonight I took my oldest on a mini date to Target where we got Starbucks (she got a hot chocolate), shared a scone, got her a new necklace and notebook.  It was fun walking around with her just looking for nothing really.  I really need to make one-on-one time a priority like I think I said last night or the night before. Repeating myself – I am getting old, give me a break.

I am going to brainstorm some things and see what I can cut out, and what I can keep to take my life back.  I know I can probably get rid of some things, and that will help with my sanity.  I also would like to clear out some of the physical clutter to help clear my mental clutter. I think they go hand-in-hand without realizing it.  Major cleaning. I hate cleaning, but know it will be better in the long run. Maybe a garage sale so it is quick – or maybe just a garbage bag and a trip tot he goodwill to make sure it really gets gone instead of hanging around waiting for a sale. Maybe I will see what sells in a day and take the rest away after.  Who knows – I just know I need to do it.

What do you need to do to take back your life?

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It is not beauty that endears, it’s love that makes us see beauty. (5)

Another Trip

That’s right another trip. Nick has another “business trip” this month and this time he is not just in another state like he was for the one about a month ago that lasted a month. This time he is in another country and those always make me nervous. I don’t care how many times your hubby is gone (and Nick has been deployed A LOT), when they leave it makes you anxious until you know they got there safe and sound.  He did make it and I don’t think it was really what he was expecting. I mean he knew it wasn’t going to be glamorous but I think he was at least expecting a shower.

shutterstock_176813414This always bring son kiddos that become hyper sensitive to every little thing, so I try to roll with the punches as much as possible! We eat lots of dinners at the table or camped out on a blanket in the living room while watching a movie. Both older kiddos have new bikes, so lots of riding around the neighborhood happens. I also was just gifted an amazing jogging stroller, so I see more running in our future so that I can get back on track and the kids can get outside and have fun.

Library time will commence. The base library is directly across from my middle kiddo’s pre-k program and she is the last pick-up of the day. We can all just walk over and pick up some new books and movies and then make our merry way home! I like this idea as I don’t have to drive anymore and spend gas money, and we can get new movies without having to pay for them!  I like free these days as it helps take care of entertainment when we are still adjusting to paying for our house in NC since we don’t have new renters yet.

We are going to bake some things this weekend. Why? Why not! We have to think of things to do, and why not do things that I did as kid.  I hope that maybe this will allow the kids to do different things, but still enjoy doing many things. I think there will be a lot of Pinterest in our future…..Maybe even a weekly series about it!

 

What do you do when one parent is gone? Any helpful ideas on saving some cash during the summer?

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